$hit we Iranians abroad have to face

[ChaharMahal]

*. We are never going back to Iran.

I don't care if Iran were to be liberal democracy tomorrow.
an overwhelming majority of us will have kids here.
We might even have some grand kids.
We have jobs.
we are just assimilated to the eco-system where we are.

We have got used to this system and we would not really prefer living in Iran aside from the fact that people talk farsi on the street.

*. Now that we are here. Start becoming part of the society.

Go Volunteering every once in a while.

For F**k sake i have never seen an Iranian doctor or nurse volunteer. ( I am sure there are some) but not nearly enough.
Never seen an Iranian engineer or Math Teacher to go down boys and girls club to tutor the kids.

* Stop inserting backward ideas from homeland into your second generation kids here. (let them integrate)
Arabs are animals
Indians are filthy.
Mexicans are lazy.
Russians are drunks.
We Iranians are Aryans.
Japanese and Koreans are smart.
Blacks are dangerous.
Whites are superior yet conspirators.


* Stop pushing the kids to STEM fields
a huge number of us push our kids to be either Medical doctors or go into some STEM
Yes for moment they are make more money.
but some people's brains are not wired for that. don't make your kids miserable (I have seen two second second gen kids in my city commit sucide)
incidentally they had pushy parents.

We need Iranian kids in humanities and other fields. It won't hurt to have second gen iranian kids that are mechanics
or farmers or ...

* Teaching the kids mother language.
if you speak Farsi, Arabic, Turkish (Azeri) whatever.

don't try to take little kids to concerts with a 60 year old Iranian guy singing.
Just invest a bit of your time and remotely try to speak 30 minutes of proper native language with your kids.

* Stop Micro Managing every aspect of your kids Lives.
For Fuck sake let them be normal.

Don't fucking cook for them and take it to their college.
Don't take their car to oil change for them.
Don't remind them of their credit card bills.
Don't push them to be in extra Credit Classes (Honor)

Stop Comparing them to other kids.

Stop telling them who made how much money.

They don't have to be super successful (monetarily) to be happy kids.

if your kid ended up being a Middle School Teacher HE /She is not a failure.
if your kid can draw. don't tell her there is no future in that.

-------------
I know some here disagree with all some of these points.

Whatever you do; let these second gen kids just be.
I am not saying let's have kids that habitual stoners.

Just let them be. Not Extra Cocky because and no with an inferiority complex.

 

[Chinaski]

namordim o ye neveshte dorost hesaabi az to khoondim. Without all those usual self made gray zones and undecisive and tarsoo stuff. This is a good one, its courageous and you atleast state an strong opinion which i agree with.

 

[The Matrix]

Yeah man I agree with everything you say.. But unfortunately Iranians dont think about how many mental issues their kids will have or if they will turn to suicide or not! That is why we have so many crazy Iranians all over the world because of bad parenting..

 

[AFRIRAN]

Just another drunk written post from spoiled LA based irooni kid who raised with 7 tooman dollars .... so what ? First please payback dad's money he paid for your so called medical school , give up your luxary car and start to make coffee for other koon nashoor americans leave your bubble then come and talk to us iranians who are living life in completely different environment, had no body to pay for our school , no mom around to cook for us and no one to warn us to don't trust these bloody black nigerians , cannot afford study in NYU even when got accepted and has to work ass of to not even consider first class citizen in one of most poorer country all because left country with 3000 toman dolllar .

 

[Bache Tehroon]

Just another drunk written post from spoiled LA based irooni kid who raised with 7 tooman dollars .... so what ? First please payback dad's money he paid for your so called medical school , give up your luxary car and start to make coffee for other koon nashoor americans leave your bubble then come and talk to us iranians who are living life in completely different environment, had no body to pay for our school , no mom around to cook for us and no one to warn us to don't trust these bloody black nigerians , cannot afford study in NYU even when got accepted and has to work ass of to not even consider first class citizen in one of most poorer country all because left country with 3000 toman dolllar .

You're wrong about him.

 

[AFRIRAN]

You're wrong about him.

We don't talk personal here , he used blanket subject for all Iranians abroad and I told him this cannot be generalised , so many things you Iranian kids living in America finding difficult to cope with it is not as bad as you guys think , step out of protected bubble made buy your parents with 7 dollar money and then come and talk to us as different generation of Iranian kids.

 

[Bache Tehroon]

We don't talk personal here , he used blanket subject for all Iranians abroad and I told him this cannot be generalised , so many things you Iranian kids living in America finding difficult to cope with it is not as bad as you guys think , step out of protected bubble made buy your parents with 7 dollar money and then come and talk to us as different generation of Iranian kids.

That's the thing. There is virtually none of us "young kids" living abroad with our parents' 7-tomani dollar Those days are long gone!

The original poster's parents and my parents actually raised us during the horrific war with no access to basic stuff like fresh-food, medicine, decent wages and even basic security.

He's absolutely right about the general trends Iranian parents fall into.

 

[keyvan_pars]

Just another drunk written post from spoiled LA based irooni kid who raised with 7 tooman dollars .... so what ? First please payback dad's money he paid for your so called medical school , give up your luxary car and start to make coffee for other koon nashoor americans leave your bubble then come and talk to us iranians who are living life in completely different environment, had no body to pay for our school , no mom around to cook for us and no one to warn us to don't trust these bloody black nigerians , cannot afford study in NYU even when got accepted and has to work ass of to not even consider first class citizen in one of most poorer country all because left country with 3000 toman dolllar .

why do you think they were raised with seven tooman dollars?
mother fucking fucking akhounds took over and people left that country. You can hardly blame a child whose parents immigrated out of iran not to be exposed to those muslim MOTHER FUCKERS. Many people in the 50s, 60s and the 70s gave all they had for that country to become what it was by 1978 and once these SHIT EATING shiite mother fuckers came into power just flushed those people down the toilet.

Yes there was oil revenue but oil revenue by itself didn't build a country as you can see in Dubai and kuwait there are only services, and corporations and no industries. Millions of iranians sweated blood to build that country and these MAFool (YANI growing up on your knees in hozeh giving ass and head to akhound following shiite child molesting tradition) just discarded those iranians in garbage. so they collected what they had and got the fuck out of that toilet.

If anything the 1000 toomani parents fucking owe the 7 toomani parents. Try to imagine leaving iran in the early 80s going to a foreign country where you don't know the language and you are already in your late thirties and you have to support a family that is used to living a middle class safe life in Iran.

I have lived in three different countries and done any job you can imagine from cleaning toilets to diving in polluted waters for waste removal so don't you go jumping to conclusions and putting titles on people.

Anyone who got out of iran with 7 tooman dollar DAMESH GARM aghlesh kaar mikard not to waste time for those FUCKED UP BACKWARD cocksuckers one million of whom went to welcome khomeini yek emaam e kooni taamaam ayar bood yani zadeh bood roo dast tamam e emaam haaye ghabl az khodesh.

 

[masoudA]

* Stop inserting backward ideas from homeland into your second generation kids here. (let them integrate)
Arabs are animals

Forget us Iranians - Who/what should be blamed for thousands killed by ISIS? What causes people to slit throats and sleep happy at night? Just give me a simple answer.
If you don't have a problem with what is taking place in Syria/Iraq or what is happening to Kurds then maybe AFRIran is correct in his assessment of you - but if you do - then tell us who/what should we blame other than Islam and the Arab Culture? BTW - Syrians, Lebanease, Egyptians,....they are not Arabs they have been Arabified, while kept much of their culture.

* Stop Micro Managing every aspect of your kids Lives.
For Fuck sake let them be normal.

I fully agree with that so do I agree with volunteering.........but you must know - the Iranian community in LA area is very different than the rest of America. And the new Iranian communities in Orange County and Toronto appears to be even worst!!

 

[AFRIRAN]

why do you think they were raised with seven tooman dollars?
mother fucking fucking akhounds took over and people left that country. You can hardly blame a child whose parents immigrated out of iran not to be exposed to those muslim MOTHER FUCKERS. Many people in the 50s, 60s and the 70s gave all they had for that country to become what it was by 1978 and once these SHIT EATING shiite mother fuckers came into power just flushed those people down the toilet.

Yes there was oil revenue but oil revenue by itself didn't build a country as you can see in Dubai and kuwait there are only services, and corporations and no industries. Millions of iranians sweated blood to build that country and these MAFool (YANI growing up on your knees in hozeh giving ass and head to akhound following shiite child molesting tradition) just discarded those iranians in garbage. so they collected what they had and got the fuck out of that toilet.

If anything the 1000 toomani parents fucking owe the 7 toomani parents. Try to imagine leaving iran in the early 80s going to a foreign country where you don't know the language and you are already in your late thirties and you have to support a family that is used to living a middle class safe life in Iran.

I have lived in three different countries and done any job you can imagine from cleaning toilets to diving in polluted waters for waste removal so don't you go jumping to conclusions and putting titles on people.

Anyone who got out of iran with 7 tooman dollar DAMESH GARM aghlesh kaar mikard not to waste time for those FUCKED UP BACKWARD cocksuckers one million of whom went to welcome khomeini yek emaam e kooni taamaam ayar bood yani zadeh bood roo dast tamam e emaam haaye ghabl az khodesh.

Why are you arguing with me ? I dont undrestand ? You who are the same generation iranian kid as mine have ever nagged about your parents and their beheavier like a talabkaar like what mentioned in the first post ? For sure not , what it took as granted in that post is what me and my generation needed to grow to our potentioal but exactly because of that mother fuckers could not have that support , come and nag like : my dady wants me to study in Hravrd law , or mommy pack my lunch or they teach me my mother tongue is just absolute spolied attitute , nonor bazi ...

 

[Hassan1980]

I see many negative stuff of Iranians outside Iran. One of them being the typical ''pedarsalari''... meaning whatever the dad/parent say is like written in a holy book. This brings conflict with their kids who are growing up in a non-Iranian atmosphere.

 

[Arash_Tombangir]

Don't remind them of their credit card bills.

This I have stopped for a while ago, but it does not work. I am the one to pay for fees and additional interest rates.. damn it!

 

[The Matrix]

Iranian parents dont seem to realize that suicide is the only option out of the life these parents have created for these kids. Forcing some one to be something or do something when the person is really weak in that area like science and math is just terrible! And this what I dont like when I see how most Iranian parents set rules and laws on the kids... They have such high expectations that their kids need to be doctor or lawyars or other high paying jobs to live happy lives and they dont know these kids might definitely end up unhappy and will develop mental issues eventually or become suicidal... My parents were the same and Im sure most of your parents were like this as well...

 

[ChaharMahal]

AFRIRAN: I think there is a misunderstanding.

I am really not gone discuss early Iranians of LA. because a major percentage of them
came here with a considerable wealth. That is really an anomaly.
an overwhelming majority of iranian parents (or students who came here)
had no money and frankly the hardwork, stay together mentality served them really well.

anyway that's how most of the families I Know here survived.

--
but frankly no matter how grateful you are for sacrifices made;
you still can be critical toward that generation's look toward life.

I was born in Iran (a county with oil and wealth.)
as opposed to being born in a County like Somalia where everyone is starving.
but it is still doesn't mean that I should not be critical of my society in Iran.

--
basically what I am trying to say is this advanced western societies really do not
reward kids that were raised in micro managed environment like ours.
We survive and might to do OK economically but we generally don't do wonders.

yes we Iranians are miniature version of Koreans. we try to plan every aspect of the kids' life.
with an emphasis on academics.

It is not bad for the parent to be involved. but In western life kids that are happy
and really successful are ones that charted their own path. you can steer your kids in the general
right direction.
(say hey if you get drunk don't drive; call me any time I give you a ride..
Say hey even if you are not ready show up in class)

but leave the specifics to the kids.

---
I have seen Iranian Doctor kids who can't pull up their pants without the help of their mother/father. I have one like that in very far related family in LA.

This girl is super hardworking (her IQ is slightly above average); But she can not boil an egg to stay alive.
she can't open her car's hood if she had too.
if she stuck behind the door with no keys; it would not occur to her to call
locksmith or just break the window with no keys.

This girl is gone have an Ok professional life. But in her personal life she is gone suffer big time.

This was truly an extreme example. but there a ton of these type of kids
in Iranian communities I have visited.

 

[Hassan1980]

Iranian parents dont seem to realize that suicide is the only option out of the life these parents have created for these kids. Forcing some one to be something or do something when the person is really weak in that area like science and math is just terrible! And this what I dont like when I see how most Iranian parents set rules and laws on the kids... They have such high expectations that their kids need to be doctor or lawyars or other high paying jobs to live happy lives and they dont know these kids might definitely end up unhappy and will develop mental issues eventually or become suicidal... My parents were the same and Im sure most of your parents were like this as well...

This is bozorgsalari that you are talking about. It is destructive. Whatever the bozorgtar says you must listen, there is no other point. If you have a other opinion you will get quickly branded as a rebel (harf goosh-nakon) or as some laat lol.

 

[The Matrix]

This is bozorgsalari that you are talking about. It is destructive. Whatever the bozorgtar says you must listen, there is no other point. If you have a other opinion you will get quickly branded as a rebel (harf goosh-nakon) or as some laat lol.

No Not really... It depends on your family environment. Everyone's family environment is different. My family was not like that at all. But I bet your family was strict and your parents would beat you and put you down constantly in your place... I was a rebel but would listen to my parents in some situations. More or less I made my own decisions but I wouldn't get beat that often and put down a lot... Believe it or not my parents were actually understanding and respected some of my decisions.

 

[Hassan1980]

No Not really... It depends on your family environment. Everyone's family environment is different. My family was not like that at all. But I bet your family was strict and your parents would beat you and put you down constantly in your place... I was a rebel but would listen to my parents in some situations. More or less I made my own decisions but I wouldn't get beat that often and put down a lot... Believe it or not my parents were actually understanding and respected some of my decisions.

Well good to hear that your parents were not like that. My parents always were of the opinion that whatever they said was the best, i could obviously voice my own opinion too but it wouldnt weigh alot overall.

Apart from my own parents who conduct a ''Irani bozorgsalari'' mindset i have seen tons and tons of Iranian families in France,Germany,Czech,Italy etc that have same typical backward way of thinking.

Trust me, the problems that the thread starter mentioned wouldnt exist if we wouldnt have these rubbishes like pedarsalaari,zansalaari,mardsalaari etc. We never had a middle way.

 

[Flint]

My parents always were of the opinion that whatever they said was the best, i could obviously voice my own opinion too but it wouldnt weigh alot overall.

By definition what you say is what YOU believe is the best. What else could it be? And remember this. When we know better, we do better. Haven’t you looked back at your life and at the decisions you made then asked yourself what was I thinking? Well, at the time what you did was the best you knew.

 

[AFRIRAN]

Well good to hear that your parents were not like that. My parents always were of the opinion that whatever they said was the best, i could obviously voice my own opinion too but it wouldnt weigh alot overall.

Apart from my own parents who conduct a ''Irani bozorgsalari'' mindset i have seen tons and tons of Iranian families in France,Germany,Czech,Italy etc that have same typical backward way of thinking.

Trust me, the problems that the thread starter mentioned wouldnt exist if we wouldnt have these rubbishes like pedarsalaari,zansalaari,mardsalaari etc. We never had a middle way.

What's wrong with you so called Irani Bozorg salari?

 

[Flint]

What's wrong with you so called Irani Bozorg salari?

You must be one of the “Bozorgs”.